My husband is trying to kill me

Seriously. Or wish the worst on me. However you spin it it’s not a good look.

A couple of weeks ago I had a stiff neck, only on the left side but it lasted for over a week!  On about the sixth or seventh day I am in my daughters closet trying to find her something to wear and my husband walks by and somehow it comes up that my neck is still bothering me. Do you know what he said to me…”Are you sure you’re not having a stroke?”  I can’t make this stuff up.  I won’t tell you my response just know that he will call 911 before he asks me that again.

Just last week, after a long day out, we come home and took our shoes off, I mention that my ankles are swollen and he comes back with “Do you have gout?”  How can I grow old gracefully when I have some trying to rush me off the scene?!?! If I say I have a headache he asks me if it’s because I’m getting older. If I stay in the bathroom a long time he tells me I should drink prune juice. If I say my stomach hurts I have gas and I just need to let it out.

I’ve heard of hypochondriacs but what do you call a person that projects that onto someone else? (Cause I’m too lazy to look it up.). Anyone else’s spouse do this?

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